Pragmatism

Yesterday the HR department in the company for whom I work sent out an email. It's that time of year where we are all asked to update everything from life insurance distributions to emergency contact information. While I am all for pragmatism, I honestly had not considered these things. Wonderful... something new over which to stress.

My emergency contact. If something happens to me and I need someone to speak for me, handle business, notify the rest of my peeps, and yes, maybe even make some tough decisions. Like whether or not to pull the plug. I don't like thinking about such things but let's face it, it's a reality of life and something that must be addressed. Added to this is the fact that I am an avid motorcycle enthusiast and that means, I live a dangerous lifestyle. The probability of something happening to me is higher than the average guy. I honestly didn't know how to respond to the email. Who do I name? My wife and I are splitting up. I can't even lean on her at the end of a bad day anymore. How can I ask her to be my voice if I can't exercise it myself?

Candidates; I have two adult kids. My oldest lives with his wife and kids in England. Can't ask him because, well it's not like he can rush right over in the event of an emergency. Ah! My 22 year old daughter! Wait... she's currently on a traveling adventure that will have her in many parts of Europe for the next couple years. That makes her hard to reach and again, it's not like she can rush right over. Okay, so I can't name my kids. My Brother? Maybe but he lives about 400 miles away. My Sister? I don't even have a phone number for her. Mom? Um... no, not mom. Needless to say, I'm paining over this one. I wonder how many others have gone through this and what they did.

In the end I did what I thought to be the best solution... I emailed my wife and asked her. Turns out she hadn't considered it either. So we agreed we would continue to be each other's emergency contact. At least until the divorce is final. That gives me at least a little time to answer that question for the long term.

I bring this up because it's something that can be listed under the "duh" column of things to take care of. Yet it's something that simply had not occurred to me. And having that question put in front of me served to dish up a lot of angst. Until I have a long-term emergency contact named I will be terribly worried about my wellbeing. I'm not suggesting my wife will intentionally cause me harm. But let's face it, a divorce has the potential of turning lovers into mortal enemies seemingly in the blink of an eye. What if I happen to really piss her off and then wipe out on my bike? Will she be too quick to have them pull the plug? Or worse, will she intentionally delay action just to prolong suffering? I hate thinking this way but I'll be honest... this crap is going through my head.

So, if you haven't considered it... do so. Because now that I brought it up I'll bet you're suddenly wondering what the hell to do. Sorry... but it needed to be stated.