Why get married?

This was a question put to me a couple nights ago. My initial response, though somewhat tongue-in-cheek was to point out that there is no material benefit for anyone in being married. Everything that one gains from a marriage can be had without it. Companionship, economic benefits, someone to speak for you in the event you cannot, kids. Of course that was more in jest than anything else.

But let it be known right now, that the mere mention of the word "Married" causes me to freeze up and become tongue-tied, unable to speak. I end up with the proverbial blank stare and can feel the fight-or-flight response kicking in. Which of course means I am not anywhere near ready to entertain such a notion. However, I am a "married" sort of man. In truth most of my mourning is over the loss of a marriage... not so much the loss of my wife. I'm not trying to be mean here but it's the lifestyle that I miss the most. Which is why the question of "Why get married?" is such an important one.

By way of explanation of what it means to me...

Being a person in a marriage makes me a part of something much larger than myself. It provides a solid sense of family for me. A sense of "home." I lay down and wake up next that special person... an exclusive person. A person with whom to share all of my successes and failures. My wife would be for me, and I for her, a staunch advocate, a protector, the biggest cheer leader, the harshest critic, an enthusiastic lover, an admired partner, the safest person with whom to be completely exposed and vulnerable, a witness to life. Married means an elevated sense of relationship. A relationship that is in and of itself completely different than any other relationship I enjoy.

These are just the parts that I am able to articulate. The truth is, for me, being married goes much deeper than mortal words can express. It affects me at the level of the human spirit. Having experienced that In my life... having grown in mind, body, spirit, heart, because of it, I know without reservation, that is where I want to be. Am I capable of that today? Likely not. But it is the ultimate goal.