Like Father Like Son

The only thing worse than my going through a divorce that has proven to be a prolonged emotional experience, is that it would seem my son is entering into it as well. Like me, my son feels everything deeply and as a dad, it's very difficult to see him going through this. Equally hard is the fact that he and his wife and kids live in a different country so It's not like I can simply pop over to be with him.

Ironically, his mom (my first wife) is also going through her own marital issues. Mother, father, and son, each going through the same thing at the same time. I actually find this to be very interesting and a notable thing indeed. We are privy to each other's deepest fears and emotions in this and at the same time, helpful to one another in a variety of ways.

If there is a silver lining to this, it would be that the three of us have come together with primary focus on my son, and working through the experience and inevitable issues together... United... Almost like a real family. Don't get me wrong... while my first wife and I have what I think to be a very special friendship, I have no intent, desire, or notion of any sort of reconciliation. Frankly one of the reasons she and I share such a good relationship now, is because we AREN'T married anymore. Not to mention the fact that my heart belongs to someone else and quite frankly, I want to keep it that way.

The down-side is this has happened at a very low point for me. I am dealing with my issues, all stemmed from this divorce. Depression, apathy, indecision, fear, work-life, home-life, money... blah blah blah. Lately I feel like simply throwing in the towel on everything and letting whatever happens... happen. This thing with my son and my need to remain strong and guiding for him has helped however, to renew my vigor, my push to stay strong, my focus. So I guess that's another good thing that has come from all this.

I just hope I have the strength to deal with everything at the same time. Life's tests...