Well… it’s happened. One of the things I feared the most… saw it coming yet was unable to stop it. I’d like to say it is entirely due to the separation but alas I cannot. At most, my separation and the resulting head-trip it’s put me through are only in a small part responsible.Giving in to the depression that has resulted first from a difficult marriage and then from my separation, I fell down on the job and that has resulted in some problematic and embarrassing issues that I now have to correct. This isn’t something that suddenly happened. It’s been building over the past year or so. As I said, I saw it coming and have only myself to blame.
As I said, I’d like very much to fault my separation for this. That would be easy. But the truth is, I should have been tougher than this. I’m a grown man… I’m a professional… this isn’t supposed to happen to me. I should have been able to manage it better. Now… Not only do I have something that needs fixing at work, I also have the resulting embarrassment to overcome as well. And don’t even get me started on the massive bruising my ego has taken. Damn it!
Dude,
ReplyDeleteDepression isn't something you let happen, and you need to watch the line between responsibility and self-flaggelation. Cut yourself some slack and start the honest, loving introspection that gives real results.